爱多少, 早知道

I was not the one, you proved it with the way you treated me.
I will never be the one, as you still having her in your heart.
I am not going to be the one, cz I worked hard enough to fight for the one.

Truth takes time to digest, forgive and forget, but lies kill.
It has proven that until this moment, you're still lieing.
You'll never realise how hurtful you've caused me, when I got to force myself to belief and to response you knowing very well you're lieing and trying very hard to lie to me.
For what reason I dont know, especially when you choose to tel me 90% of the truth with 10% lies covering the other truth.
Coz if you know or if you understand, you'll never do this to me.

From the tone of you speaking about her, I know you love her, not knowing how much, but 1 thing for sure, its so much more than me.
You proved it with your action, your sacrifies for her, your thoughts for her.
You now hate her, for her cruelty and bitchy act she did to you.
But do you know the more you loved the more you hate?
Its because you still care.

I once loved you as how you love her, even more.
I hated a lot, cause I care a lot. I jealous, and sumtimes I regretted.
Now Im no longer. Its not about the love or hate, but more on fed up and give up.

Knowing very well you're using me to get over her, I've given chance for you to make things right for us.
You promised, but you breached it again with lies.
I tried so hard to accept the fact that you lied to me and forgiven the unintention mistake.
However, I was wrong, wasted time and mind to think, to accept, to forgive and working so hard to forget, because, sadly, the confesion of the 1st lie is the 2nd lie.
I tried so hard to convince myself to give you another chance after the 2nd lie, looking for lame excuses to agn forgive you.
It proven that you still take me as nothing, by easily telling me, 'no, no more, I never hide anything from u now".. and that's the 3rd lie..

Is that a communication problem? or a understanding problem?
Is that really hard to tell me the truth? If you're telling lies, please be smart, cz I'm not stupid.
Before the break up, after the patch back, or even during the patch back.
The wound has never heal, what makes it worse is you continue hurting it.
But I know, blame it all on me. Especially when I already know the condition so well, and Im still giving chances to you.

Very easy to do those? Try it. =)
I dont know how much more chances and hurts I would be able to stand or hold before I give up.
When the tears for you has left with no more.
I know it is coming very soon.

Thank You
For teaching me the hard lessons